Putting my feet on the ground this morning was harder than any morning in a very long time.
Like many of you, I am reeling.
I hoped, against all odds. that the books I wrote in 2018 and 2020 would drift into irrelevance, at least with regard to politics. That we would be living in a brighter future with a secure safety net in the coming years.
Unfortunately, this morning, the books are more relevant than ever—and they're the best I can offer as we process what just happened and figure out how to maintain our health and well-being.
Three-quarters of the way through The Habit Trip, you, the reader and hero of the story, find yourself consumed with grief and unable to move...
"The venom from all those little bites of outrage and despair makes its way into your veins, and you are lost to heartache. The weight of the world comes crashing at your feet. You sit down in the middle of the road, put your head between your knees to stop the world from spinning, and close your eyes against the ache. It’s too much—too much hate, too many assumptions and expectations, too much suffering and division.
"Your mind spins. Nothing I do makes a difference. I can’t even move. How am I supposed to keep showing up for all the things—mine or anybody else’s?
"Thankfully, you know a little something about the physiology of stress. When humans perceive stressful situations, their heart rate, blood pressure, and stress hormones go up. Muscles tense, the nervous system fires up, and digestive and immune system functions plummet.
"You know that when you’re on high alert, you are not capable of talking yourself out of these physiological responses. Your instincts take over, and your mind takes a back seat until the threat has passed. And you know from experience that if a little kid is terrified, angry, or hurt, you can’t have a rational talk with them until they calm down—adults are no different. The best you can do is hold space for them until they can breathe again.
"Breath. Of course. Breath.
"You don’t even have to lift your head from between your knees to take a breath, and you know you can manage that much, even with poison in your veins."
I've heard from many of you—privately—that these books have given you solace.
Physical Disobedience is for funneling rage and heartache into stability and connection.
The Habit Trip teaches the science of behavioral reinforcement through a whimsical, Shel Silverstein-inspired journey, complete with dragons, a talking dog, a broken down pinto, and an orb for transportation. It doesn't tell you what to do. It helps you learn how.
Both are available in audio.
If you need access to any of the above and truly can't afford it, please reach out. I will figure out a way to get it to you.
If you tackle The Habit Trip. I recommend reading through to the end and skipping the many questions it asks, until you're good and ready to circle back and answer them.
The Relief By Design course is also available—15 videos, less than 10 minutes each, to help you build whatever routines you need, on your own terms.
But today is about breath.
My feet made it to the ground this morning. My body is periodically consumed by chills from adrenalin and cortisol. I'm working with clients, doing my physical therapy, listening to music, and checking on my loved ones, including you.
Today, all we can do is what we can do, and that's good enough.
Take care of yourself and your people. Hold onto your anchors.
If you already have The Habit Trip, skip to Chapter 9: Emergency Plan.
Reach out for help if you need it. You are not alone.
Sarah
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Past posts can be found here.