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One question to start the New Year

We have many new faces here, so I want to send out a huge welcome to new folks and a thank you to all of you for reading and engaging with these letters for so many years!

Please don't hesitate to hit reply if you have questions or if I can be helpful in any way.

I'm sure you've been peppered with countless New Year's memes this week, so I'd like to offer an alternative today.

The beginning of a new year can be a natural time for reflection and renewal, but if you're like many of my private clients, the idea of setting goals can make you grumpy. Goals are often associated with past failures or downright rebellion against being hemmed in.

I get it!

Sometimes it's easier to look back than forward, so when I'm working with folks who are hesitant about goals but want to keep growing, we flip the conversation to focus on old constraints that don't fit anymore.

Here's a question to consider for the New Year:

What is an assumption you made about yourself in the past that might not be true anymore?

Maybe you used to believe:

  • you weren't capable of shutting off work at the end of the day;

  • the clutter in the house is a hopeless pile of misery that you could never begin to tackle;

  • nighttime or morning routines are useless;

  • you are "bad" at exercise;

  • you'll always dislike your body no matter what else changes;

  • you have no interest in exploring new recipes or foods,

... but now you're curious to see if those things are actually true.

I talked with a client yesterday who was playing with these assumptions and turned the idea of "letting herself" do things upside down.

She wants to continue letting herself have an extra cigarette if she wants one (that habit isn't ready to be broken yet), but she also wants to let herself choose to go to the gym or make plans with an old friend or get an extra load of laundry started—without turning it into an insurmountable question of whether she can keep it up for the rest of the year. So...

If you were to "let yourself" try something new this year, what would it be?

The work I do with people is all about pleasure and experimentation. Sustainable well-being is rooted in finding things you love and doing more of them.

If you need support, check out the group coaching info or books below to learn more about creating a personalized approach to healing. Or, if you prefer your privacy, schedule a consultation to see if we are a match for private coaching.

Wishing you a peaceful start to the New Year!



Three kinds of gratitude

"Research shows that gratitude can boost mental and physical health, increase positive feelings, help us connect more deeply with others, reduce stress, and even trigger better outcomes in our lives."

Gratitude journals are great, for sure, but there are lots of other options, as well!

Sometimes we equate feeling grateful with expressing gratitude outwardly, but those are two very different skill sets and states of being.

Click here to read this week’s Hey, Health Coach column at Forbes to learn about Quiet, Active, and Cooperative Gratitude and how to give them a try.

👉 You can also send your own anonymous question to me at Hey, Health Coach, and don't forget to pick a pseudonym!


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